A Geno Fish Story

Sweet has sent me the following, which explains a lot. Or not. I'm not sure. Geno tries to confuse me and succeeds with an astonishingly high rate of, oh, let's just call it the luck of the Geno.

Here it is.



Tramp, Geno finally confessed to his where abouts for the past three weeks. It took a bit of whipping but I knew he would come around.

AFFIDAVIT OF GENO
STATE OF OHIO )
ss.COUNTY OF SOMEPLACE )

GENO, being duly sworn, deposes and says that:
I was not really in South Carolina I was fishing.
1. I caught a Walleye (hereinafter called "THE FISH" in Earth Lake, Ohio on May 1, 2006 (hereinafter called the "Fish Story").
2. The Fish Story resulted in my landing this fish into the fishing boat without assistance from any other man, woman, child or dog.
3. THE FISH weighed, without insertion of any unnatural weights into THE FISH no less than eight and one-half (8.5) pounds.
4. I caught THE FISH on a regulation fishing pole and only had one pole working at the time.
5. I used a regulation leach and/or minnow to catch THE FISH.
6. I recognize that my friend Tramp is actually a much better fisherman than I am, but that due to my age and endless opportunity to fish, I lucked out.
7. If my Fish Story is accepted, I will not rub it in more than an appropriate number of times. I also realize my friend Tramp is a slow payer having become tired of paying all those taxes so that I could see the world.
8. I understand this affidavit must be submitted with a receipt from the taxidermist who assisted me in my Fish Story and that payment will be forthcoming, maybe.
9. In summary I understand clearly that there is nothing worse than being called a liar much less a big liar.

I SWEAR UP AND DOWN AND ALL OVER THAT THE FOREGOING IS TRUE AND WITHOUT A DOUBT THE BIGGEST FISH STORY THERE EVER WAS.
GENO

If I am a better fisherman than Geno, it really is pure luck. The last time Geno and I went fishing, I threw a bare hook into the lake. Geno came over and said, "Bro, you forgot to bait your hook." I replied, "I didn't forget. I just don't want some fish interrupting my beer drinking." And wouldn't you know it, a fish hit my shiny bare hook! True story!