Monday, December 17, 2007

Riverbank Complaint Policy

Here at the Riverbank, we take complaints seriously. Reader satisfaction is very important to us.

Our official complaint policy was clearly stated in the very first post. If you have a complaint, no matter how trivial you may think it is, we genuinely do care. Never would we judge a person by a complaint they might have.

I believe in the infamous words of the great Jack Handy, who said, “Never judge a man until you’ve walked a mile in his shoes. Because then, you’re a mile away and you have his shoes.”

The complaint policy here conforms with our freebie attitude. It costs you nothing, plus you gain another freebie. So without further delay, here is that policy.

The Riverbank Official Complaint Policy

If you have any complaints, no matter how small they may seem to you, and you would like to be heard, here is the procedure to follow.

*Write down your complaint on a full size sheet of notebook paper. Include details.
*Sign it, date it, fold it three times, and place it in a self-abused, stomped envelope.

*Set it on fire.

Hey, free heat!


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