And The Airline Joke Contest Continues
Here is my latest in my airplane joke contest with Carrie, a former flight attendant, from the Moon Connection blog. This contest, for lack of a better work, has two requirements. It must be one she, a former flight attendant, has never heard. And it must be good. Wish me luck.
A Boeing 747 was flying for the first time ever with both the pilot and co-pilot being of Polish origin. They were descending to land at their destination. The pilot called the control tower for clearance to land. The tower told them they were clear to land on runway 7R. The pilot asked them to repeat that last transmission. Again, the tower told them they had 7R. The pilot radioed back that this was a 747 and that runway looked to be too short. The control tower told them that 747's land on that runway every day. Alright, said the pilot. The co-pilot said it really looked too short and announced on the intercom, "Attention passengers. We have been given clearance to land on what appears to be a runway that looks too short. We will be trying to stop this plane very fast, so hold on." They came down on the very beginning of the runway and did everything they could to stop the plane as fast as possible. The plane just barely came to a stop with the front wheel halfway off the other end of the runway. "Whew, that was close. That is the shortest runway I've ever seen", said the pilot. The co-pilot said, "Yes, but look how wide it is."
posted by Tramp at
Friday, May 05, 2006
7 Comments:
sorry- heard that one already- although, I think i flew a whole month with that cock pit crew! There were pilots I could keep a regular bra on for, and then others I had to switch to a sports bra for landing, so as not too injure 'the girls'....Ever notice the license is TO FLY the plane, not TO LAND? I always insisted that landings equal take-offs- it was a mandatory thing with me, or NO COFFEE FOR YOU!!!!!
I am going to enjoy this contest.
Thanks for including me.....
Including you? Your it! Gotta admit, the Lady encourages me to give you a hard time.
You know I fly the RC plane. Landing them is easy. Just go straight down and they land. But landing them in one piece is the hardest part of the whole experiance. The first time I tried to land my P-51 Mustang, I did't know how to scrub off speed. Had electric planes before it. They top out at 20 MPH. Piece of cake. The Mustang came in at 140. I did a go around. When I got it slowed down to about 50, it was the ulgiest landing you ever saw. But it was in one piece. Only a warbird can survive my landings. And it's only 6 feet wide. I'm gonna stay there for a while. I'll leave the 747's to the Polish pilots.
Oh, I just thought of another one. It's by Dana Carvey. I'm putting it up now.
That was a good one. My Dad designs models for SIG and Balsa USA.....he has been a pilot for over 50 yrs and still has trouble handling the smaller versions. I grew up watching my brother and cousin wreck them one after another, smelling that goofy gas they use, getting the bandaids when they would 'really' cut the finger on a prop.....everyone should grow up in the country smelling the paint you use to decorate the planes, to the fuel they use in the engines. Fond memories...and the sound- like bumble Bees on Steroids! Chasing the planes down to see how many pieces you could find....
Those planes have come a long way. They no longer sound like bees. The bigger engines sound more like Cessnas. They now have a five cylinder plane with a round engine like the old fighters. With the bigger hot running engines and the bigger fuel tanks, there will be no pieces to search for in the resulting explosion and fire from the crash. A friend of mine built a ten foot wide plane with eight jet engines on it. When it crashed in the woods, it burned down the entire woods. Aren't hobbies fun!
Smokey Bear doesn't think it's fun!
He was always such a spoil sport!
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