Nine Things That Displease Me

1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time. I know where my watch is, where's yours. Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the bathroom is?

2. People who are willing to get off their butt to search the entire room for the TV remote because they refuse to walk to the TV and change the channel.

3. When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". Darn right! What good is cake if you can't eat it?

4. When people say "It's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this?

5. When people say while watching a film "did you see that?". No, I paid $12 to come to the cinema and stare at the floor.

6. People who ask "Can I ask you a question?". Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya?

7. When something is "New and improved". Which is it? If it's new, then there's never been anything like it before. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it.

8. When people say "Life is short". Life is the longest thing anyone ever does. What can you do that's longer?

9. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus come yet?". If the bus came would I be standing here?

Thanks to TZ at Laffaday.